Quiz and Toolkits
Saddleback WORKS is here to help you find the best way to create new connections and relationships with coworkers. We've built a quiz to help you discover the best way for you to build friendships with those around you. Based on your answers, we will identify a specific toolkit that will give you practical steps to develop an environment at work where you can live out your faith with others. Take the quiz now!
Integrating Faith at Work
Whether you are young, old, rich or poor, we all go through some of the same experiences in life. This practical tool is built around 12 major life events.
Each one includes actionable takeaways from experts from our staff.
Simple Learning
Our workplace ministry wants to do more than just inform. We want to equip you to engage. Simple Learning consists of tools that will teach you how to practically integrate your faith at work in a variety of circumstances.
Check out our YouTube Channel to watch these short videos from respected contributors and professionals who offer insights on how to have faith that is obvious and integrity intact at work.
All VideosMeet the Team
Research Findings
Our team, led by incredible volunteers, spent the better part of a year in research, and we want to share our many findings with you! We used two methods of research: qualitative and quantitative.
Qualitative Research
We interviewed a diverse group of our members, including men and women from every age group. We asked them to share their work story and faith story, and we listened well for the intersections between the two.
Quantitative Research
We sent out a 3-minute survey through our small groups and were able to get over 1,100 completed within just two days!
A Glimpse of What We Learned
95%
believe integrating faith at work is important but
85%
feel like they're winging it and have no clear roadmap
75%
are cautious in their approach to faith integration
70%
have a college degree or higher
60%
are worried to be misunderstood or offend their colleague
- From this data, we learned that workplaces have become as diverse as the people in them.
- As a Christ-follower, you are highly motivated to live your life with integrity but when it comes to integrating your faith at work, you may feel like you're making it up as you go.
- You want to avoid making others feel awkward.
This research is the basis for the practical tools we have built for you!
Aging
Some of our coworkers may be the primary or assistant caregiver of an aging parent or loved one.
So, how do we C.A.R.E. for our coworkers who are dealing with the stress of being a caregiver?
Cares
CrisisUnderstanding the Stress of Caregiving & Aging
- One of the most universally challenging roles a person can assume is that of being a caregiver to an aging loved one. And did you know that over 40 million Americans serve as family caregivers, providing daily unpaid support to an aging family member?
- Caring for an aging loved one can take a heavy toll on the caregiver and the family, and there are significant emotional, vocational and financial concerns. Caregivers often have to quit their jobs, take early retirement, or have a leave of absence. Here are some recent stats about caregivers:
- 75% say caregiving is a source of pride because they make a difference in the life of their loved one
- 74% say their jobs are impacted
- 69% say caring for a loved one is the #1 source of stress in their lives
- 60% are worried about the financial impact caregiving will have on their savings
- 58% provide more than 10 hours of care for a loved one each week
- 42% spend well over $5,000 each year “out-of-pocket” to provide care for their loved one
- 27% are in the “Sandwich Generation”—caring for their children as well as aging parents
- 1 in 4 caregivers say family relationships have suffered because of caregiving responsibilities
- 3 in 5 caregivers share a home with the loved one for whom they provide care.
ApplicationPractical Suggestions for Caring
- LOOK—Realize your coworker may actually need time to grieve the loss of what life looked like before caring for their parents. They may need to go through the Five Stages of Grief:
- Denial: My parents will get better soon.
- Anger: Why do I have to be the one to take care of them?
- Bargaining (with God): Release me from this, God, and I will do whatever else you want me to, just not this!
- Depression: I'm so sad, frustrated, angry, disappointed that this is my life now.
- Acceptance: I'm at peace with our new phase of life, and I will do whatever it takes to care for my aging parents to the best of my ability. It is what it is.
- ASK—Sometimes our coworkers need our empathy and positive encouragement. And your questions can help them think ahead or think outside of themselves.
- How's your mom or dad doing today?
- What's it like to be taking care of your parents? Is that hard?
- What can I do to support you here at work?
- LISTEN—Be available just to listen to your coworker talk about whatever they need to share, including stories about their parents, in the present and past.
ReferenceWhat does the Bible say about Caregiving?
- Ecclesiastes 3:1-8: This is just a season
- Matthew 11:28-30: God sees us when we are tired and weary
- Philippians 4:10-13: God gives us strength
EngageNext Steps for Engaging Your Coworker
- OFFER affirmation and positive feedback but don't assume you know how your coworker feels, because you don't. Give grace and encourage them.
- CONNECT with them in a fun way to escape the stress of this season like morning coffee or lunch with work friends, where conversation is light, funny and interesting.
- SUGGEST a Counselor if they are really struggling and need an outside perspective or invite them to attend a Saddleback Church service with you. If they enjoy reading give them the gift of a helpful resource, such as:
- The Caregiving Season: Finding Grace to Honor Your Aging Parents by Jane Daly
- While They're Still Here: A Memoir by Patricia Williams.
- PRAY for your coworker, their aging parent, and the details of their caregiving situation.
Death & Grieving
Whether you are young, old, rich or poor, death is a part of our lives.
So, how do we C.A.R.E. for our coworkers who are suffering the loss of a loved one?
Cares
CrisisUnderstanding Death + Loss + Grief
- The death of a loved one or close friend is one of the biggest stressors in life—it's also a crucial opportunity to show care and support for your coworker.
- Grieving is a necessary part of healing, and healthy grieving requires the care and support of a community. But grief can also intensify depending on how people react to the person dealing with loss.
- According to grief experts, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross and David Kessler, there are Five Stages of Grief—and it's important you understand these stages as you care for a coworker:
- Denial: This is not really happening right now.
- Anger: Why me? Is this my fault?
- Bargaining (with God): Take this away and I will do whatever you ask of me.
- Depression: I can't think straight and I can barely get out of bed in the morning.
- Acceptance: I'm allowing myself to be sad and grieve with this loss, and I'm starting to experience peace.
ApplicationPractical Suggestions for Caring
- LOOK—Your coworker might need some support if you notice any of these symptoms:
- Forgetfulness
- Exhaustion, physically drained
- Withdrawn and lonely, crying bouts
- Loss of appetite or excessive eating, drinking, etc
- Taking on demanding schedules to avoid grief topic
- Physical distress such as headaches, heart/chest pain, upset stomach
- ASK—Sometimes we ignore grief because we don't want “to make things worse”, but the best way to care for your coworker is to ask questions like:
- How are you doing today?
- How can I support you at work this week?
- Can I offer you some of my sick days?
- What are you missing most about your loved one today?
- LISTEN—Be available to listen to your coworker talk about what he or she is going through and be present if they're not ready to talk.
ReferenceWhat does the Bible say about Death?
- Psalm 147:3: Jesus cares about our broken hearts
- 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18: Jesus gives us hope amidst grief
- Romans 12:15: It's good to grieve with our friends
- John 11:34-35: Jesus experienced grief and loss too
EngageNext Steps for Engaging Your Coworker
- OFFER any help you are able to give—at work or at home (projects, meals, lawn care, pet care, laundry, travel arrangements, etc.). Send a card letting them know you're thinking about them with a small gift card for coffee or groceries. Say something like this (copy as necessary):
- So sorry to hear about your loss! Just want you to know we are all here to support you. Here's a little something to help you get through the week.
- CONNECT them to the Minister of the Day, grief counselor, or a grief support group here at Saddleback Church: 949-609-8000.
- SUGGEST they attend a Saddleback Church service with you or watch it online.
- READ a book about grief: Helping Those in Grief: A Guide to Help You Care for Others by H. Norman Wright.
- PRAY for your coworker, for their family, for their “new normal” as they deal with loss and grief.
Divorce
Divorce and separation are never easy.
So, how do we C.A.R.E. for our coworkers who are experiencing the anger, pain and loss of divorce and separation?
Cares
CrisisUnderstanding the Stress of Divorce or Separation
- Regardless of the reasons, divorce and separation impact every area of a person's life: physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, financial, even vocational for some. To show you care about your coworker going through divorce or separation, it's helpful to understand the stress and emotions they may be experiencing.
- According to a recent article in the Huffington Post, there areFive Emotional Stages of Divorce, similar to the stages of grief:
- Denial: I can't believe this is happening!
- Anger: What went wrong? He/she is so terrible!
- Bargaining: I can't handle this emotionally, so I will negotiate whatever I need to go back to the way it was before.
- Depression: I can't go to work or face my coworkers or my ex-spouse.
- Acceptance: This is my/our new reality.
ApplicationPractical Suggestions for Encouraging
- LOOK—Realize your coworker might be stressed about the divorce, even if they say they're happy or relieved to move on. They may be stressed if you notice any of these symptoms:
- Lack of concentration
- Defensive or overly-emotional
- Physical exhaustion or illness
- Loss of appetite or excessive eating, drinking, etc.
- ASK—Sometimes our coworkers want encouragement and support even when they try to appear strong and independent. So here are a few questions you can ask them:
- How can I support you at work this week?
- How's your family doing? How are your kids responding to your news?
- Do you have a good support system right now?
- Is there anything I can do to support you and your family?
- LISTEN—Be available just to listen to your coworker talk about the pain, anger, sense of relief, and stress of the whole experience. Avoid telling your own story re: divorce or separation unless they ask, or avoid stating your biblical stance on marriage—which could do more harm than good if your coworker is not a follower of Jesus.
- EXPRESS KIND CONCERN—If necessary, kindly express your concern if your coworker is making unwise choices during this season by saying something like, “I'm concerned about you. The choices you're making don't seem like you. Are you doing okay?”
ReferenceWhat does the Bible say about God's response?
- Philippians 4:6-7: God gives us peace
- Proverbs 3:5-6: God will guide us
- Ephesians 6:10-17: God gives us strength
EngageNext Steps for Engaging Your Coworker
- OFFER empathy and concern, but hold back on giving advice or stating your biblical stance on divorce; what they need is a friend to encourage them to make healthy decisions right now.
- CONNECT them to a friend or small group at church who understands the heartbreak of divorce or separation or a trusted Counselor—for Saddleback Church Counselors, call 949-609-8000.
- SHARE the link to listen to Saddleback Church Online as a way to relieve stress.
- SUGGEST a Saddleback DivorceCare group for your coworker and their kids, if they have a family, and Saddleback's Financial Freedom Ministries if they need help with finances.
- PRAY for your coworker and their family in this new season.
Empty Nest
Some of our coworkers may be experiencing the life- changing effect of children leaving the nest to launch their own lives.
So, how do we C.A.R.E. for our coworkers who are dealing with the effects of becoming an empty-nester?
Cares
CrisisUnderstanding the Stress of Empty Nest Syndrome
- Empty Nest Syndrome (ENS) refers to the psychological phenomenon that parents or guardians experience when children leave home, and it's real. ENS usually begins when the youngest child leaves for college or when children get married and begin their professional careers. This stress is often compounded by the stress of caring for aging parents, financial stress of paying for college, career changes, and so on.
- Couples and single moms dealing with Empty Nest Syndrome may experience the following emotions:
- A profound sense of loss
- Marital conflicts
- Identity crisis
- Moderate to severe depression
ApplicationPractical Suggestions for Encouraging Coworkers
- LOOK—Realize your coworker may actually need time to grieve the loss of what life looked like when their children were living at home. They may need to go through the Five Stages of Grief:
- Denial: My kids aren't really leaving, they will be back soon
- Anger: Why is this so hard? Things would be better if they listened to me!
- Bargaining (with God): Make things “normal” again and I will go to church every Sunday!
- Depression: I'm so sad, I have no energy to do things and I cry all of the time.
- Acceptance: I'm at peace with our new phase of life, and I look forward to the opportunities ahead of me/us.
- ASK—Sometimes our coworkers need our empathy and positive encouragement, and your questions can help them think ahead or think outside of themselves.
- How are things going for [child's name]?
- What's it like to be in the empty-nest phase?
- What advice would you give to me when I get to that stage?
- LISTEN—Be available just to listen to your coworker talk about whatever they are feeling and experiencing in this new season.
ReferenceWhat does the Bible say about our Future?
- Proverbs 22:6: Empty-nesting is a normal, healthy part of raising children
- Isaiah 46:4: God will take care of us
- Philippians 1:3-6: God is faithful in all of our seasons of life
EngageNext Steps for Engaging Your Coworker
- OFFER affirmation and positive feedback:
- Wow, you are handling all of this so well!
- I can understand why you would be sad! It's ok to cry.
- What are you looking forward to now that you have an empty nest?
- CONNECT with them in a fun way to celebrate this new season: morning coffee, dinner out as couples, a weekend concert, and so on.
- SUGGEST a Counselor if they are really struggling and need an outside perspective, invite them to attend a Saddleback Church service with you, or offer one of the following resources:
- When You're Facing the Empty Nest: Avoiding the Midlife Meltdown When Your Child Leaves Home by Mary Ann Froehlich
- Empty Nest: What's Next? Parenting Adult Children Without Losing Your Mind by Michele Howe.
- PRAY for your coworker and for this new empty-nest season.
Imprisonment
Sometimes we work alongside people who are convicted of a crime or have loved ones serving time in jail.
So, how do we C.A.R.E. for our coworkers who are dealing with a jail sentence or the incarceration of someone they love?
Cares
CrisisUnderstanding the Stress of Imprisonment
- Incarceration of a loved one causes a lot of emotional, mental, physical, financial, and relational stress.
- Separation from loved ones serving time in jail and the stress caused by the separation can have long-lasting ripple effects on everyone affected, personally and publically, not to mention the potential stress and trauma experienced prior to incarceration.
- Understand that individuals and their families experiencing the heartbreak of incarceration deal with a heightened sense of these emotions on a daily basis:
- Guilt
- Anger
- Loneliness
- Resentment
- Embarassment
ApplicationPractical Suggestions for Encouraging
- LOOK—Realize your coworker might be stressed about this situation but too embarrassed to talk about it. They are most likely concerned about:
- Public perception
- Personal loss and the loneliness of separation
- Impact on the rest of the family, particularly children
- Finances and job security
- Feelings of confusion, anger or betrayal regarding the conviction
- ASK—Sometimes our coworkers need our support even when they try to appear strong and independent. So here are a few questions you can ask them:
- Is there anything I can do to support you and your family?
- What do you need most right now?
- How can I help you with your workload this week?
- LISTEN—Be available just to listen to your coworker talk about the situation. Avoid sharing your own take on the situation.
ReferenceWhat does the Bible say about God's response?
- Jeremiah 29:11-14: God knows the future
- Psalm 34:18: God is with you
- Joshua 1:9: God gives us strength
EngageNext Steps for Engaging Your Coworker
- OFFER empathy and concern, and DON'T JUDGE—if your coworker is dealing with a loved one in jail, give some grace. Recognize that your coworker is not the one convicted of a crime; try to understand how hard it may be for them to be in this situation too.
- CONNECT with them in supportive ways such as sending a card or leaving a note and a small gift on their desk.
- SHARE the link to listen to Saddleback Church Online or a copy of What On Earth Am I Here For? book as a way to encourage them during this time.
- SUGGEST Saddleback's Financial Freedom Ministries if they need help with finances or a Support Group if they need a supportive community.
- PRAY for your coworker and for their loved ones during this time.
Job Loss
Job loss can be a shock to the system. It affects every aspect of life and is one of the most difficult emotional challenges to overcome.
So, how do we C.A.R.E. for our coworkers who are dealing with the emotions and challenges of job loss?
Cares
CrisisUnderstanding the elements of stress in job loss
- Losing a job can be completely overwhelming for some individuals, especially if the individual lacks confidence or has self-doubt in new situations and environments. In fact, research shows that getting fired or laid off from a job can feel worse than losing a spouse.
- According to the research, individuals who experience job loss struggle to return to the same level of well-being based on measures of mental health, satisfaction with life, and self-esteem. And many individuals experience anxiety, fatigue, difficulty sleeping, problems concentrating, and depression following the loss.
- The emotional rollercoaster elements of being fired include:
- Shock – “I did not see that coming.”
- Anger – “I was not prepared for how angry I would feel about being fired.”
- Humiliation – “How am I going to tell people I was fired?”
- Disappointment – “I worked so hard and now if feels like it was for nothing.”
- Loss – “I had it all: perks, great salary, title, travel, friends…and it is all gone.”
- Disconnection – “I didn't even get to say goodbye to everyone.”
- Guilt – “I wish I had handled things differently or made better decisions.”
- Panic – “How am I ever going to pay my bills?”
- Pity – “Why did this happen to me?”
- Indifference – “Who cares anyway? I'm better off without this job.”
ApplicationPractical Suggestions for Encouragement
- LOOK—Realize your friend, family member, or coworker may actually need time to cycle through feelings of self-pity. This is normal. But recognize opportunities to encourage them with a healthy daily routine and goals.
- ASK—Sometimes individuals going through job loss need validation like, “This must be a really difficult season for you.” Don't hesitate to ask questions like:
- How are you doing today? What are you feeling or thinking today?
- What do you need most from me as your friend in this season?
- What can I do to support you as you look for a new job?
- LISTEN—Be available just to listen. They may need to process their shock and devastation out loud, or maybe they need someone to listen to the dreams and possibilities of what comes next (no matter how realistic or far-fetched it may sound).
ReferenceWhat does the Bible say about Our Future?
- Jeremiah 29:11-13: God knows our future
- Romans 8:28: God will meet our needs
- 1 Peter 5:7: God cares about us
EngageNext Steps for Engaging Your Coworker
- OFFER a safe place by allowing them to feel, think, and say whatever they are experiencing during this time. You don't have to fix the situation for them, but you can encourage them and help them as time goes on.
- CONNECT them with other acquaintances who have been in similar circumstances or with potential opportunities. And connect them with Saddleback Church Career Coaching.
- SUGGEST they take this time to discover more of their strengths, talents, and values. Whether it was a welcomed change or not, they have the chance to start over. Suggest these personality and leadership assessments as they seek a new job or career:
- StrengthsFinder (recently re-named the Clifton Strengths Assessment)
- The DISC Profile
- The Myers-Briggs or MBTI Personality Type - free assessment.
- Paterson Center Thinking Wave-Length
- The Table Group's Ideal Team Player - online assessment.
- PRAY for them and ask God to give you opportunities to share his love and hope with your friend, family member, or coworker going through this difficult season.
Moving
Whether it's a first-time move or a series of moves, moving to a new home and a new area can be a stressful event in our lives.
So, how do we C.A.R.E. for our coworkers who are moving to or from your community?
Cares
CrisisUnderstanding the Stress of Moving
- Moving and buying a new home is not for the faint hearted, especially when there is a new job and a family involved. So, it's helpful to understand the stress and emotions your coworker may be experiencing with moving to show you care.
- According to financial author, Laura Doolin, there are Five Emotional Stages of Moving, especially to a new city:
- Excitement: I get to start over in a new place!
- Terror: What am I doing?!
- Doubt: Is this the right decision?
- Apprehensive Enthusiasm: This will be a good thing (said repeatedly).
- Acceptance: There's no turning back—this is the best decision for me/us in this season.
ApplicationPractical Suggestions for Helping
- LOOK—Realize your coworker might be stressed about moving and may handle their stress differently than you do. They may be stressed if you notice any of these symptoms:
- Fuzzy thinking or decision-making
- High intensity at work
- Physical exhaustion or illness
- Loss of appetite or excessive eating, drinking, etc.
- ASK—Sometimes our coworkers need help, they just don't know how to ask for it. So here are a few questions you can ask them:
- What's the latest with your move?
- How can I support you at work this week?
- Which day suits best to bring a meal for your family?
- When is your moving day, and where do I show up to help? Or what night suits best for me to help you unpack some boxes?
- LISTEN—Be available just to listen to your coworker talk about the moving process, including their biggest stressors; avoid telling stories about your own crazy moving experiences.
ReferenceWhat does the Bible say about Helping Others?
- Hebrews 13:16: Helping others pleases God
- Galatians 6:2: Helping others is a command, not just a suggestion
- James 2:14-17: Helping others is how we express our faith
EngageNext Steps for Engaging Your Coworker
- OFFER any help you are able to give—at work or at home (projects, packing, garage-sales, meals, carpool, etc.).
- WELCOME them if they are a new coworker. Introduce them to others in the company. Invite them to lunch or meetings that would be beneficial to their onboarding process. Let them know you are available if they have questions or concerns as they adjust to their new working environment.
- CONNECT them to a new friend or new small group in your area or in the area where they are moving to or to a trusted moving/real estate service.
- SHARE the link to listen to Saddleback Church Online as a way to relieve stress.
- SUGGEST your favorite places to shop, eat, go to school, find services, etc. if they are new to your area.
- PRAY for your coworker, for their family, and for their “new normal” as they move to a new home in a new area.
New Baby
Some of our coworkers may have a new baby either through birth or adoption.
So, how do we C.A.R.E. for our coworkers who are adjusting to life with a new baby?
Cares
CrisisUnderstanding the Stress of Adjusting to Life with a Baby
- Self-care is at an all-time low, particularly for the mother.
- Financial pressure increases—particularly if one parent chooses to stay at home instead of return to work.
- Health issues for the birth mom and newborn are a real concern—not to mention the rollercoaster of hormones and emotions.
- Lack of sleep heightens stressful situations and conversations for the parents.
- Parenting other children in the family as they adjust to a new baby is also a focus and sometimes a concern during this time.
- Most parents experience guilt when returning to work after having a new baby or adopting—especially if this is their first child.
- Anxiety over pumping in the office—the topic no one wants to talk about but is a reality for many first-time moms who are breastfeeding their babies.
ApplicationPractical Suggestions for Encouraging New Parents
- LOOK—Realize your coworker may actually need time to ease back into their new normal as a coworker and now a parent. It may take a few days or weeks before they are able to bring their best to work again. Recognize the tension and guilt they may feel returning back to work.
- ASK—Sometimes our coworkers need our encouragement during this time. Check in with them by asking a few questions:
- How's the baby? How's everyone adjusting at home?
- Is there anything I can do to support you here at work?
- Do you have time to grab coffee so we can catch up and I can fill you in on what's been happening with work since you went on leave?
- LISTEN—Be available just to listen to your coworker talk about whatever they need to share. Keep in mind, this time is often an emotional rollercoaster. Tears are normal, as is wanting to dive back into work and feel productive after being on leave.
ReferenceWhat does the Bible say about Parenting?
- 2 Corinthians 3:4-5: God gives us confidence to be competent as parents
- Proverbs 22:6: Parenting God's way
- Philippians 4:6-7: God gives us peace
EngageNext Steps for Engaging Your Coworker
- OFFER encouragement and support—especially if you understand what they are going through. Share your own stories (funny or frustrating) as a way of normalizing the circumstances; but be mindful to listen more than you share.
- CONNECT with them in a fun way to escape the stress of this season like morning coffee or lunch with work friends, where conversation is light, funny and interesting, and not all about babies, kids or parenting woes.
- SUGGEST a Counselor if they are really struggling to adjust to this new season; invite them to attend a Saddleback Church service with you. And if they enjoy reading, give them the gift of a helpful resource, such as:
- How We Love Our Kids by Milan and Kay Yerkovich
- First Time Mom: Getting Off on the Right Foot by Dr. Kevin Leman
- First Time Dad: The Stuff You Really Need to Know by John Fuller.
- PRAY for your coworker, their new baby, their spouse, and the rest of their family.
New Job
Sometimes the first few weeks of a new job or new career can be exciting, as well as difficult and challenging.
So, how do we C.A.R.E. for our coworkers who are dealing with the stress of starting a new career?
Cares
CrisisUnderstanding the Elements of Stress in a New Job
- Starting a new job means a time of proving oneself, of learning a new routine, meeting new people, learning new personalities, taking on new challenges, mastering a new schedule and set of goals, and facing the typical politics of the workplace.
- Taking on a new job or new career may also cause stress and anxiety related to expectations, and learning a new task can be challenging to deal with, possibly causing feelings of inadequacy. It is also common to experience fatigue, difficulty sleeping,and problems concentrating along with the stress and anxiety. Some degree of this is normal and to be expected in those first few weeks and months.
- If we're going to empathize with a new coworker or friend starting a new career, it's important to understand the legitimate worries most of us have when starting a new job:
- Do I actually know what I am doing?
- Will my coworkers like me?
- Will the boss like me or will everyone like me as their boss?
- What if I make a big mistake on the job?
- I feel overwhelmed. Am I really cut out for this job?
- I'm so going to get fired for this?
- Recognize that new job stress affects the entire family, particularly when a physical move is required.
ApplicationPractical Suggestions for Encouragement
- LOOK—Realize your coworker may actually need time to get to know you and trust you as someone they can come to with a question or frustration.
- ASK—Sometimes our coworkers need our empathy, understanding, and positive encouragement. You too were once new on the job! So, don't hesitate to ask questions like:
- How are you settling in to your new job?
- How is your family adjusting to your new schedule or your new career?
- What can I do to support you as you learn the ropes here at work?
- LISTEN—Be available just to listen to your coworker talk about whatever they need to share or when they have questions about the way things are done.
ReferenceWhat does the Bible say about Work and Stress?
- Matthew 6:25-34: Don't worry
- Colossians 3:23: Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart
- Galatians 6:4-5 (The Message): Do the best you can with your life
EngageNext Steps for Engaging Your Coworker
- OFFER affirmation and positive feedback. Share helpful workplace expectations. Encourage them to be a listener and a learner as they lead in this new space.
- CONNECT them with other coworkers and different teams over lunch, coffee or conversation in the workplace.
- SUGGEST healthy personal rhythms as they establish a new professional rhythm—because there is a tendency to overwork during the first few months of a new job. Ask them what they like to do for fun, exercise, family time or down-time on the weekend. Suggest these books on how to best lead and influence in the workplace:
- How the Best Leaders Make Everyone Smarter by Liz Wiseman
- The Way of the Shepherd: Seven Secrets to Managing Productive People by William Pentak and Kevin Leman.
- PRAY for them and ask God to give you opportunities to share his love with your friend, family, or coworker going through this new season.
Relationships (Marriage)
Whether it's the excitement of getting married or the stress of a frustrating friend situation, relationships can bring out the best in us and the worst.
So, how do we C.A.R.E. for our coworkers who are experiencing the excitement or stress of relationships in their lives?
Cares
CrisisUnderstanding the Stress of Relationships
- Getting married, moving in with new roommates, or dealing with family can bring joy and stress to our lives. Relational joys and stressors are inevitable because we are human.
- According to pastor and author, Pete Scazzero, the highs and lows of our relationships are often influenced by an individual's emotional health. Here are symptoms of someone who may be struggling emotionally and relationally:
- Defensive/Blaming
- Low Self-Awareness
- Anger/Fear
- Self-Absorbed
- Addiction
- Dishonesty
ApplicationPractical Suggestions for Caring
- LOOK—Celebrate with your coworker who is experiencing the joy of a recent engagement or new relationship! And be on the lookout for a coworker who might be relationally stressed. They may be stressed if you notice any of these symptoms:
- Make cynical comments about people in their lives
- Speak negatively about their family
- Seems a little more intense around holidays and vacations
- Exert more energy for an after-work social hour than their actual job
- Seem distracted and distant
- ASK—Sometimes our coworkers need us to reflect back to them how they are coming across at work:
- You seem a little stressed about the holidays. Is everything okay?
- You seem more excited about social hour than the work you're doing. Is there anything I can do to support you this week?
- You seem a little defensive in meetings, is there something bothering you?
- You seem a little distracted. Is there something going on that you want to talk about?
- LISTEN—Be available just to listen to your coworker talk about their excitement or their stress. Avoid sharing your own wedding planning experience or relational stress unless they ask or it seems appropriate to do so.
ReferenceWhat does the Bible say about Loving Others?
- Matthew 22:37-40: Loving others is a command, not just a suggestion
- 1 Corinthians 13:4-7: How to love others
- 1 John 4:17-19: Why we love others
EngageNext Steps for Engaging Your Coworker
- OFFER any support you are able to give—a few minutes to celebrate with them at the start of your work day or a listening ear over coffee or lunch.
- CONNECT them to Saddleback Church's Premarital Resources or Financial Freedom Ministry if they are getting married, OR if they are struggling, connect them to Church Counseling or a Support Group if they need outside perspective: 949-609-8000.
- SHARE the link to listen to Saddleback Church Online as a way to relieve stress.
- PRAY for your coworker and their relationships.
Retirement
Retirement can be a shock to the system, no matter how long you plan for it or anticipate this new season. It takes time to ease into retirement after years of a challenging and/or rewarding career.
So, how do we C.A.R.E. for our coworkers who are dealing with the highs and lows of anticipating retirement?
Cares
CrisisUnderstanding the aspects of Retirement
- Retirement is a time of enormous change. Leaving a job and colleagues and finding new things to do are all part of the retirement scene. Some individuals experience anxiety, fatigue, difficulty sleeping, problems concentrating, and depression, even if they've been planning their retirement for years!
- Keep in mind that not everyone retires by choice. Some individuals are forced to retire due to illness, physical problems, or financial considerations, such as layoffs. Forced early retirement can result is stressful financial burdens on the individual, couple, or extended family.
- Even when one retires by choice with sufficient money in the bank, they may find that retirement isn't all that they thought it would be. Going from working a full- time job to having nowhere specific to go or do each day can result in feeling bored and unproductive. After years of structured schedules, the hours can seem endless.
- Top 4 stressors in retirement and how to cope:
- Financial concerns: Fixed income in retirement can cause stress and the retiree may have to consider a part-time job, if necessary.
- Health concerns: Health problems and changes in insurance coverage can contribute to the stress.
- Caregiving: Dealing with an ill spouse or parent can add another layer of stress during retirement, especially if the spouse or parent suffers from Alzheimer's disease.
- Relationship issues: Unreconciled differences with a spouse or other family member can flare up and contribute to stress during this time. Children and grandkids have busy schedules and the retiree often feels left out of their lives. Retirees can feel lonely and isolated missing their work colleagues.
ApplicationPractical Suggestions for Encouragement
- LOOK—Realize your friend, family member, or coworker may actually need time to be “excited” about this new season. Let them know they will be missed and express your appreciation for the strength, consistency, value, and wisdom they brought to you and your workplace.
- ASK—Sometimes individuals going through job loss need validation like, “This must be a really difficult season for you.” Don't hesitate to ask questions like:
- What are you looking forward to in your retirement?
- What will (or do) you miss about your job?
- What's been helpful to you as you make this transition?
- LISTEN—Be available just to listen. They may need extra grace as they experience a variety of emotions (highs and lows), a new sense of freedom, and a deep sense of loss.
ReferenceWhat does the Bible say about Our Future?
- Jeremiah 29:11-13: God knows our future
- Romans 8:28: God will meet our needs
- Philippians 1:6: God completes his good work in us
EngageNext Steps for Engaging Your Coworker
- OFFER a safe place by allowing them to say, think, and feel whatever they are experiencing during this time. You don't have to fix the situation for them or project your dreams of retirement freedom on them, but you can encourage them to rediscover themselves during this time.
- CONNECT them with other acquaintances who have been in similar retirement circumstances. And connect them with Saddleback Church Career Coaching if they are looking for a part-time job or a post-retirement career pathway.
- SUGGEST they take this time to discover more of their strengths, talents, and values. Whether it was an anticipated retirement or a sudden early retirement, they have the chance to rediscover themselves. Suggest these personality and leadership assessments as they seek a new identity, a part-time job, or a post-retirement career pathway:
- StrengthsFinder (recently re-named the Clifton Strengths Assessment)
- The Enneagram
- The DISC Profile
- The Myers-Briggs or MBTI Personality Type - free assessment
- Paterson Center Thinking Wave-Length
- OR suggest these books and resources as they settle into retirement:
- Rethinking Retirement by John Piper
- Falling Upward by Fr. Richard Rohr
- Bible Money Matters—Give More, Save More, Live More (web resources).
- PRAY for them and ask God to give you opportunities to share his love and hope with your friend, family, or coworker going through this joyful and challenging season.
Sickness
Sickness and chronic pain can add significant emotional and physical stressors on an individual that most likely impact their quality of life; however, these stressors often get missed during brief interactions or go unnoticed by coworkers.
So, how do we C.A.R.E. for our coworkers who are dealing with sickness and chronic pain?
Cares
CrisisUnderstanding the aspects of Sickness and Chronic Pain
- Did you know that approximately 50 million Americans are suffering from sickness and chronic pain? According to the Center for Disease Control (CDC), chronic pain and illness exist in epidemic proportions here in the US.
- Sickness can be temporary due to infection or disease or it can be chronic—this is known as CI: chronic illness.
- Chronic Pain, known as CP, is ongoing physical discomfort that is severe enough to disrupt normal activities and everyday life. The most common causes of Chronic Pain may be:
- Back injuries
- Rheumatoid arthritis
- Neuropathy
- Cancer
- Multiple sclerosis
- Fibromyalgia
- Lupus
- Gastro-intestinal disorders
- Migraine headaches
- Other autoimmune diseases and disorders
- Both sickness and chronic pain are known to contribute to high levels of negative emotions and depression. Chronic pain can even have a long-lasting cognitive effect on people, causing the nervous system to deteriorate over time.
- Sickness and chronic pain affect every aspect of an individual's life, including their relationships, their work, their faith community and spiritual beliefs, and their ability to participate in normal activities.
ApplicationPractical Suggestions for Encouragement
- LOOK—Realize your friend, family member, or coworker may actually not want to acknowledge their sickness or chronic pain. Other times they may need talk about what it's like to live with sickness and pain. Pay attention to when they seem open to conversation and when they would rather not talk about it.
- ASK—Sometimes individuals going through sickness and chronic pain may need validation like, “This must be a really difficult season for you.” Don't hesitate to ask questions like:
- What is it like to have fibromyalgia?
- What do you wish people knew about your illness?
- How can we support you here at work?
- LISTEN—Be available just to listen. They may need extra grace as they experience a variety of emotions (highs and lows), a sense of loss, and struggle with their “new normal.”
ReferenceWhat does the Bible say about this season?
- Isaiah 53:3-4: God knows our pain
- James 1:2-4: Suffering produces growth and maturity
- 1 Peter 5:10: God will restore us someday if we trust in Him
EngageNext Steps for Engaging Your Coworker
- OFFER a safe place by allowing them to say, think, and feel whatever they are experiencing during this time. You cannot fix the situation—in fact, most chronic pain can only be managed, not completely healed. Give them space to “just be” in your presence at work. Understand that your coworkers going through sickness and chronic pain are most likely asking themselves these questions:
- Why me?
- Why can't I be healed?
- Why does God allow pain and suffering?
- CONNECT them with other acquaintances who have had similar circumstances—their own sickness or illness in the lives of loved ones. And connect them with a Saddleback Support Group if they are looking for community and support.
- SUGGEST they consider talking to a health professional about their sickness or pain, if they have not done so already, and suggest a counselor who can provide a listening ear and coping skills for this challenging season. Also suggest these books and resources as they deal with sickness and pain:
- Walking with God through Pain and Suffering by Timothy Keller
- Hope When it Hurts by Kristen Wetherell and Sarah Walton
- You'll Get Through This: Hope and Help for Your Turbulent Times by Max Lucado.
- PRAY for them and ask God to give you opportunities to share his love and hope with your friend, family, or coworker going through sickness and chronic pain.
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