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    Resource Details

    A Faith That Doesn't Hold On To Hurt

    Rick Warren | August 30, 2020

    It can be difficult to let go of bitterness, especially when we’ve been deeply hurt by someone. But bitterness is costly — it’s like drinking poison and hoping it will hurt the other person. In this message, Pastor Rick Warren continues our study through the Book of James by pointing out seven very expensive costs to holding on to hurt.

    Message Action Plan

    Message Action Plan

    Three Essential Questions
    After watching the message take some time reflect on the following three questions.

    1. What did you hear? What point in this message was most impactful for you?
    2. What do you think? How did this message challenge, change, or affirm your thinking?
    3. What will you do? How will you put into practice what you've learned today?

    "Everyone has turned from God and is going the wrong direction. Nobody is living right. People tell lies about others that stink like an open grave. They verbally attack each other with poisonous words-like the venom of a deadly snake. Their speech is filled with vicious curses and bitter resentment, and they are quick to react violently with anyone who disagrees. So, wherever they go, they leave division and misery because they've never learned how to live in peace."   Romans 3:12-17

    "(In worship), we praise our Lord and Father but then (in the world) we curse the people that God himself created in his image! Out of the same mouth comes blessing and bitterness! Brothers and sisters, this is not right! There is no way that sweet water and bitter water can flow out of the same spring!"           James 3:9-10

    WHY SHOULD I NEVER HOLD ON TO A HURT? (The Cost of Bitterness)

    ACTION PLAN: Count the cost. During your quiet time this week, ask yourself if the name of someone that had hurt you came to mind as you listened to the message. If so, then write that name down on a piece of paper and ask yourself if any of these seven statements apply to how you responded to that hurt.

    1. Anytime I harbor a hurt, I walk out of God's will.

      "If you are angry, you cannot do any of the good things that God wants done!" James 1:20 (CEV)

      "Human anger does not achieve God's righteous purpose."            James 1:20 (TEV)

      "Those who have wicked hearts hold on to anger."
                                   Job 26:13 (NCV)

    2. Anytime I retain resentment, I halt my happiness.

      "Some men stay happy until the day they die...others have no happiness at all; because they live and die with bitter hearts."   Job 21:23-25 (TEV)

    3. Anytime I breathe bitterness, I suffocate my spirit.

      "A stone is heavy and sand is weighty, but the resentment caused by a fool is heavier than both."     Proverbs 27:3 (NLT)

      "You are only hurting yourself with your anger." Job 18:4 (TEV)

    4. Anytime I internalize anger, I harm my health.

      "To worry yourself to death with resentment is a foolish, senseless thing to do." Job 5:2 (TEV)

      "All they get are days full of sadness and sorrow, and they end up sick, defeated, and angry."     Ecclesiastes 5:17 (NCV)

    5. Anytime I hold a grudge, I will hurt many people.

      "Look after each other so that you keep living in God's grace, being gracious to each other. See that no root of bitterness grows up among you, because if you become bitter about anything, you'll miss God's grace, and that will cause much trouble. A bitter person will poison and ruin everyone else."  Hebrews 12:15

    6. Anytime I won't let it go, I act like an unbeliever.

      "Angry people without God pile grievance upon grievance, always blaming others for their troubles."  Job 36:13 (MES)

      "The godless are full of resentment."  Job 36:13 (NLT)

    7. Anytime I won't forgive I block God's forgiveness.

      "If you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins." Matthew 6:15 (NLT)

    HOW DO YOU LET GO OF A HURT?

    1. Give it to God!

      "Whenever you pray, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him and let it drop- just leave it and let it go, in order that your Father in heaven may also forgive you for your failings and shortcomings and let them drop."       Mark 11:25 (AMP)

      "What is needed everywhere is for people to lift their holy hands in prayer instead of having angry disputes and resentment." 1 Timothy 2:8

      "...Never avenge yourselves. Leave that to God, for he has said that HE will repay those who deserve it!"       Romans 2:8 (LB)

    2. Heal it with grace!

      "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you."  Ephesians 4:32 (NIV)

      "My gracious favor is all you need. My power works best in your weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:9 (NLT)

      "Everything you say should be kind and well thought out so that you know how to answer everyone." Colossians 4:6 (GW)

    3. Nail it to the Cross

      "Those who belong to Christ Jesus have nailed their sinful attitudes and desires to his cross and crucified them there. So now, since the Holy Spirit has given us a new life and power, let us follow His leading in every part of our lives. Let us not be pridefully stubborn, or irritate each other, or be jealous of each other." Galatians 5:24-25

    ACTION PLAN: If any of these statements rang a bell in you, with your piece of paper, go to the Lord in prayer. Tell him about your hurt and how you have responded to it. Ask him to forgive you for how you responded to the hurt and the bitterness and resentment that you have in your heart. Ask him to empower you to forgive and to give you the strength to be gracious by not holding their sin against them, and by being kind with every word you speak. As you pray, think of the cross and Jesus' sacrifice which provided the means for God to forgive you. In your mind, nail that offense to the cross and realize that Jesus died, paying the cost, for that hurt too.

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